Tanner is starting up driver's ed next month. This afternoon, we spent some time at the high school parking lot letting him drive around. Both the car and I survived somehow. Actually, he did just fine. And thus begins a new, scary phase of my life. I don't think I'm going to make it. He was in seventh heaven.
In other news, Lindsey goes off the beta blockers starting tomorrow. Her pulse has been just under a hundred most nights, so let's hope it stays there. It needs to stay under a hundred for us to keep her off of the beta blockers.
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
The status of things
Both of my readers might be wondering about the status of various things that are going on, so here are some quick updates:
1. I'm now weaning Lindsey off of the beta blockers. I've cut the dose in half, and her pulse has stayed around 100, which is good. I'll give it another couple of days and then eliminate them completely, monitoring her pulse to make sure it doesn't spike again.
2. Tanner has no residual effects from his dog bite. There's no sign of an infection, he was current on his tetanus shot, and the dog was current on its rabies shot, so we're done worrying about it.
3. I had another funny singles moment the other day. When the Animal Control officer wanted to come to the house to interview Tanner, I told her that I was at work. She asked if my wife was at home. I told her that I was a single dad. That wasn't the answer she expected, and she stammered out an apology. I told her that it was no big deal, which was true. It's just interesting to note how we all expect the world to work a certain way and then we're thrown off when it doesn't in a particular instance. It's the same thing with having kids who are adopted. People don't expect to hear that, so when they find out, they're not quite sure how to react.
4. Michelle has made great progress in correctly pronouncing the names of Twin Cities suburbs.
5. Tanner and I are somehow still surviving early-morning seminary.
1. I'm now weaning Lindsey off of the beta blockers. I've cut the dose in half, and her pulse has stayed around 100, which is good. I'll give it another couple of days and then eliminate them completely, monitoring her pulse to make sure it doesn't spike again.
2. Tanner has no residual effects from his dog bite. There's no sign of an infection, he was current on his tetanus shot, and the dog was current on its rabies shot, so we're done worrying about it.
3. I had another funny singles moment the other day. When the Animal Control officer wanted to come to the house to interview Tanner, I told her that I was at work. She asked if my wife was at home. I told her that I was a single dad. That wasn't the answer she expected, and she stammered out an apology. I told her that it was no big deal, which was true. It's just interesting to note how we all expect the world to work a certain way and then we're thrown off when it doesn't in a particular instance. It's the same thing with having kids who are adopted. People don't expect to hear that, so when they find out, they're not quite sure how to react.
4. Michelle has made great progress in correctly pronouncing the names of Twin Cities suburbs.
5. Tanner and I are somehow still surviving early-morning seminary.
Friday, September 20, 2013
Well, that was unexpected
I didn't wake up this morning thinking that I'd have the police at the house, that I'd be wondering about rabies shots, and that I'd find myself in the ER at St. Paul Children's Hospital, but that's how things ended up.
Tanner's been sick the past couple of days. He walked home from school yesterday morning. As he was walking, a dog ran toward him, got tangled up in his legs, knocked him down, and bit him on the wrist. It wasn't a bad bite, but it punctured the skin. Tanner knew which house was the dog's.
Today, I took him early to get a strep test. (It was negative.) He was complaining about how much his wrist hurt. I got thinking that if we needed to have him looked at, our insurance company would want to go after the dog's owners, so I thought I'd better file a police report. I called the city. The animal control officer wanted to interview Tanner but needed an adult there, so I came home for the afternoon with plans to work at home. The officer spoke with Tanner and suggested that we have the bite checked out just to be sure. I called the pediatrician's office, and they said that Tanner should go to a pediatric ER, not just a general ER. The closest one is up in St. Paul.
So Tanner and I drove all the way up there. No ER is fun, but we were in and out in three hours, which I considered to be not too awful. There's no sign of infection, but the doctor was worried about the possbility of rabies. She also wanted to x-ray his wrist, which he'd hurt when the dog knocked him down. The x-rays were negative. The only unresolved issue was the possibility of rabies. Fortunately, the police were able to confirm tonight that the dog is current on its rabies shots, so Tanner won't have to get them. He's quite happy about that.
Anyway, that wasn't the day that I expected.
Tanner's been sick the past couple of days. He walked home from school yesterday morning. As he was walking, a dog ran toward him, got tangled up in his legs, knocked him down, and bit him on the wrist. It wasn't a bad bite, but it punctured the skin. Tanner knew which house was the dog's.
Today, I took him early to get a strep test. (It was negative.) He was complaining about how much his wrist hurt. I got thinking that if we needed to have him looked at, our insurance company would want to go after the dog's owners, so I thought I'd better file a police report. I called the city. The animal control officer wanted to interview Tanner but needed an adult there, so I came home for the afternoon with plans to work at home. The officer spoke with Tanner and suggested that we have the bite checked out just to be sure. I called the pediatrician's office, and they said that Tanner should go to a pediatric ER, not just a general ER. The closest one is up in St. Paul.
So Tanner and I drove all the way up there. No ER is fun, but we were in and out in three hours, which I considered to be not too awful. There's no sign of infection, but the doctor was worried about the possbility of rabies. She also wanted to x-ray his wrist, which he'd hurt when the dog knocked him down. The x-rays were negative. The only unresolved issue was the possibility of rabies. Fortunately, the police were able to confirm tonight that the dog is current on its rabies shots, so Tanner won't have to get them. He's quite happy about that.
Anyway, that wasn't the day that I expected.
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Ummmm, oops
Okay, still not getting the parenting thing right. As I've mentioned before, Lindsey is not to be trusted. She lies. We've been working on it, and now that I think about it, I think she's actually gotten better lately. We may be making some progress. However, once you earn a label, it's hard to shake.
I came home yesterday to find that my closet light was on and that some things had been moved around. My master bathroom door was also wide open, which I wouldn't have done. It was nothing serious, but there's really no reason for the kids to be in my bathroom, and I didn't like the light being left on.
Reaching the logical conclusion, I went out to the back yard to ask Lindsey why she'd been playing around in my bathroom and closet. After all, there would have been no reason for Tanner to be in there, right? Lindsey vigorously denied having done anything. Knowing that she was lying, I got after her for lying, told her that I never knew when to believe her, and asked her to please stop lying to me about things. She held her ground, but she always holds her ground even when it's crystal clear that she's been lying.
Finally, just on the one-in-a-thousand chance that I was wrong, I asked Tanner if he'd been in my bathroom. He said that oh, yes, he'd been in there taking some pictures for his Swiss friend Flavio. (Not sure what's so interesting about my bathroom and closet, but I'll leave that aside for now.) I then had to face the music and apologize to Lindsey for falsely accusing her. Of course, any kid in that situation knows that she's got the parent right where she wants him, so she milked it for a while. She sulked the way only a falsely-accused nine-year-old can sulk. She forgave me in the end, though, and didn't even immediately demand a pet (which she's getting anyway).
Dang. I probably need to set up another counseling session to undo that damage, right?
I came home yesterday to find that my closet light was on and that some things had been moved around. My master bathroom door was also wide open, which I wouldn't have done. It was nothing serious, but there's really no reason for the kids to be in my bathroom, and I didn't like the light being left on.
Reaching the logical conclusion, I went out to the back yard to ask Lindsey why she'd been playing around in my bathroom and closet. After all, there would have been no reason for Tanner to be in there, right? Lindsey vigorously denied having done anything. Knowing that she was lying, I got after her for lying, told her that I never knew when to believe her, and asked her to please stop lying to me about things. She held her ground, but she always holds her ground even when it's crystal clear that she's been lying.
Finally, just on the one-in-a-thousand chance that I was wrong, I asked Tanner if he'd been in my bathroom. He said that oh, yes, he'd been in there taking some pictures for his Swiss friend Flavio. (Not sure what's so interesting about my bathroom and closet, but I'll leave that aside for now.) I then had to face the music and apologize to Lindsey for falsely accusing her. Of course, any kid in that situation knows that she's got the parent right where she wants him, so she milked it for a while. She sulked the way only a falsely-accused nine-year-old can sulk. She forgave me in the end, though, and didn't even immediately demand a pet (which she's getting anyway).
Dang. I probably need to set up another counseling session to undo that damage, right?
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Lindsey update
It's probably time for an update on Lindsey's thyroid.
Her pulse in the evening has been right around 100, which is just where it should be for a nine-year-old. That's the beta blockers doing their thing. She had her blood drawn on Friday to see if the thyroid medication has kicked in yet. Her thyroid levels have fallen to just above the normal range now, so that's looking much better. We may be able to take her off of the beta blockers soon. We'll learn more from the endocrinologist this week.
She's not displaying any side effects from the thyroid medication. On the other hand, I can't necessarily say that her symptoms have gotten any better, but I expect that to take time. Overall, two weeks into this experience, things seem to be going about as well as could be expected.
Tanner and I have now survived nine days of getting up at 4:50 a.m. for seminary. By my count, we have 651 days of seminary left until he's done with high school. I then get a one-year break, and then I start the whole thing up again with Lindsey. So I only have to do this for 1,311 more days to get both kids through seminary. That's doable, right?
Her pulse in the evening has been right around 100, which is just where it should be for a nine-year-old. That's the beta blockers doing their thing. She had her blood drawn on Friday to see if the thyroid medication has kicked in yet. Her thyroid levels have fallen to just above the normal range now, so that's looking much better. We may be able to take her off of the beta blockers soon. We'll learn more from the endocrinologist this week.
She's not displaying any side effects from the thyroid medication. On the other hand, I can't necessarily say that her symptoms have gotten any better, but I expect that to take time. Overall, two weeks into this experience, things seem to be going about as well as could be expected.
Tanner and I have now survived nine days of getting up at 4:50 a.m. for seminary. By my count, we have 651 days of seminary left until he's done with high school. I then get a one-year break, and then I start the whole thing up again with Lindsey. So I only have to do this for 1,311 more days to get both kids through seminary. That's doable, right?
Thursday, September 12, 2013
Pronunciating Minnesota suburbs
First off, let me say that it's a good thing that Michelle doesn't know about the blog or I'd be in real trouble for the entry I'm about to write. Since I'm totally safe, though, here goes.
I'll just say it outright: Michelle has a Utah accent. She denies this, and it's a pretty touchy subject for her, so don't tell her that I said anything about it. When you talk with her, just pretend you can understand everything she's saying even if some of the words are unclear or strange-sounding.
(True story, although I shouldn't have to specify that because everything I say on the blog is absolutely true: When I first met Michelle, she told me she'd been to "Wells." I couldn't figure out what she was talking about until I finally realized that she meant "Wales." I'm not making that up. It rilly happened.)
To help her blend in a little more when she comes here next month, I've been coaching her on the pronunciation of some of the Twin Cities suburbs. I've given her these five names to practice: Wayzata, Edina, Mahtomedi, New Prague, and Vadnais Heights. These names are the Minnesota equivalents of Hurricane, Utah, which, as you probably know, is not pronounced the way you would normally pronounce the word "hurricane." Same with Tremonton and Tooele.
I just gave Michelle a quiz, and she was zero for five, so she's definitely got some prep work to do before she actually gets here. I'm hoping Ryan and Jenny can give her some coaching before she gets here. It has to be subtle, though. Don't let her know that you're coaching her. Just casually slip in some comments like, "Michelle, which would you like to visit while you're in the Twin Cities: Wayzata, Edina, or Mahtomedi?" or, "Michelle, did you know that Vadnais Heights is famous for [whatever the heck Vadnais Heights is famous for]?" Things like that. We'll have her talking like a native Minnesotan in no time, dontcha know?
I'll just say it outright: Michelle has a Utah accent. She denies this, and it's a pretty touchy subject for her, so don't tell her that I said anything about it. When you talk with her, just pretend you can understand everything she's saying even if some of the words are unclear or strange-sounding.
(True story, although I shouldn't have to specify that because everything I say on the blog is absolutely true: When I first met Michelle, she told me she'd been to "Wells." I couldn't figure out what she was talking about until I finally realized that she meant "Wales." I'm not making that up. It rilly happened.)
To help her blend in a little more when she comes here next month, I've been coaching her on the pronunciation of some of the Twin Cities suburbs. I've given her these five names to practice: Wayzata, Edina, Mahtomedi, New Prague, and Vadnais Heights. These names are the Minnesota equivalents of Hurricane, Utah, which, as you probably know, is not pronounced the way you would normally pronounce the word "hurricane." Same with Tremonton and Tooele.
I just gave Michelle a quiz, and she was zero for five, so she's definitely got some prep work to do before she actually gets here. I'm hoping Ryan and Jenny can give her some coaching before she gets here. It has to be subtle, though. Don't let her know that you're coaching her. Just casually slip in some comments like, "Michelle, which would you like to visit while you're in the Twin Cities: Wayzata, Edina, or Mahtomedi?" or, "Michelle, did you know that Vadnais Heights is famous for [whatever the heck Vadnais Heights is famous for]?" Things like that. We'll have her talking like a native Minnesotan in no time, dontcha know?
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Lindsey's tightrope
Lots going on with Lindsey's physical and emotional health these days.
First, the beta blockers have brought her pulse down to a reasonable level. I measure it every day, and it's been around 100, which is about where it should be for a nine-year-old. Later this week, we'll test her thyroid levels again to see if the thyroid medication is kicking in. If it is, we can wean her off of the beta blockers. We'll keep an eye on her for any side effects from the medication.
Emotionally, Lindsey still has a lot going on. Michelle will be coming out to Minnesota for visits in October and again over Thanksgiving. I believe Michelle's exact words were, "I want to experience Minnesota in all of its glory, so I'm really, really hoping for at least two feet of snow and subzero temperatures the whole time I'm there." Okay, maybe those weren't her exact words, but I'm fairly confident that's how she feels.
Now you can imagine that this is a little tricky for Lindsey. She struggles with both Stace and me seeing other people. (Stace is seeing a man named Jody, who was a friend of ours going back to when we first moved to the southern part of the Twin Cities back in 1995. The kids already know him because he'd been at the house a couple of times after we came back from Switzerland.)
My relationship with Michelle is trickier for Lindsey than Stace's relationship with Jody for a couple of reasons. First, the kids live with me, so having someone new around the house, even just for a visit, has a big effect on their world. Second, as Michelle and I have both been expecting, Lindsey is worried that Michelle's presence will affect Lindsey's relationship with Stace. Lindsey has never been completely secure in her relationship with her mom. She told me the other night that if Michelle is around, she'll see even less of Stace than she does now. I keep reassuring Lindsey that Stace and I will be her parents no matter what and that she'll still be able to see Stace just as much. I just need to keep giving her that message.
On the other hand, Lindsey feels secure in her relationship with me. (At least, I'd like to think so.) I'm the one who's around her every day. She knows that she can get upset about the divorce, and even tell me that she's unhappy with me, and I won't freak out. I just tell her that I'll always love her even if she's mad at me or if she thinks I'm not a good dad. That usually satisfies her.
(Side note: have I yet mentioned the sign she made me wear the other day? She wrote up a sign that said, "Not a good parent" and made me wear it for the evening. She was unhappy with me for seeing Michelle and for making her move faster when it was bedtime. I wore the sign for a while, and by the time she went to bed, she relented and told me I didn't need to wear it anymore. I can put up with stuff like that, and she dishes it out because she knows I won't overreact.)
So, guess what? Lindsey will be starting up with some counseling visits again. I'll get some professional help in navigating all of this because I'm just kind of making it up as I go along.
First, the beta blockers have brought her pulse down to a reasonable level. I measure it every day, and it's been around 100, which is about where it should be for a nine-year-old. Later this week, we'll test her thyroid levels again to see if the thyroid medication is kicking in. If it is, we can wean her off of the beta blockers. We'll keep an eye on her for any side effects from the medication.
Emotionally, Lindsey still has a lot going on. Michelle will be coming out to Minnesota for visits in October and again over Thanksgiving. I believe Michelle's exact words were, "I want to experience Minnesota in all of its glory, so I'm really, really hoping for at least two feet of snow and subzero temperatures the whole time I'm there." Okay, maybe those weren't her exact words, but I'm fairly confident that's how she feels.
Now you can imagine that this is a little tricky for Lindsey. She struggles with both Stace and me seeing other people. (Stace is seeing a man named Jody, who was a friend of ours going back to when we first moved to the southern part of the Twin Cities back in 1995. The kids already know him because he'd been at the house a couple of times after we came back from Switzerland.)
My relationship with Michelle is trickier for Lindsey than Stace's relationship with Jody for a couple of reasons. First, the kids live with me, so having someone new around the house, even just for a visit, has a big effect on their world. Second, as Michelle and I have both been expecting, Lindsey is worried that Michelle's presence will affect Lindsey's relationship with Stace. Lindsey has never been completely secure in her relationship with her mom. She told me the other night that if Michelle is around, she'll see even less of Stace than she does now. I keep reassuring Lindsey that Stace and I will be her parents no matter what and that she'll still be able to see Stace just as much. I just need to keep giving her that message.
On the other hand, Lindsey feels secure in her relationship with me. (At least, I'd like to think so.) I'm the one who's around her every day. She knows that she can get upset about the divorce, and even tell me that she's unhappy with me, and I won't freak out. I just tell her that I'll always love her even if she's mad at me or if she thinks I'm not a good dad. That usually satisfies her.
(Side note: have I yet mentioned the sign she made me wear the other day? She wrote up a sign that said, "Not a good parent" and made me wear it for the evening. She was unhappy with me for seeing Michelle and for making her move faster when it was bedtime. I wore the sign for a while, and by the time she went to bed, she relented and told me I didn't need to wear it anymore. I can put up with stuff like that, and she dishes it out because she knows I won't overreact.)
So, guess what? Lindsey will be starting up with some counseling visits again. I'll get some professional help in navigating all of this because I'm just kind of making it up as I go along.
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